11 replies to this topic

[arimibn]

So. I'll try and start from the beginning.

The week of July 21 - 22 was what I wholeheartedly consider to have been the worst that I've ever lived through.

From here on, I'll just copy and paste the deviantart journal.

"So let me start at the beginning.

Monday was actually a great day. I hung out with AJ and we exchanged Eid Gifts before he left the country.

Tuesday. Tuesday is where my week went to hell. My mom kicked me out of the house on Tuesday. Now this isn't even the worst of it. Tuesday night. 10:16 PM. These 3 guys jumped me and tried to steal my bike. They knocked me off my bike, beat me while I was on the ground, and made me bleed. A lot.

But I wouldn't let them take my bike. Or my phone. Or my wallet. I needed them. I needed them. So I did what they forced me to do. And I took my fist, and I knocked one of the guy's teeth down his throat. Then I gave another one of them a knee to the neck, at which point they ran off while telling me to watch my back. I made it up the street before I passed out in front of a restaurant. I woke up surrounded by the paramedics and the police. I was still trying to process it. I just got jumped. ...But...I still had my wallet. I still had my bike, and I still had my phone. ...So it wasn't that bad right? ...Right? Well the thing is. While I was fighting, I dropped a lot of the stuff I had in my bag. Like my glasses. All of my hygeine stuff. My 3DS. All of my games. I fucking dropped them. They didn't take them from me. I dropped them while I was fucking running away. Like a coward.

Why am I so upset over this? Because my 3DS and video games are MUCH more to me than just video games. They're memories. Memories of friends I'll never see again. And I lost them. Because I ran like a fucking coward.

Wednesday. I spent Wednesday in the hospital. I can't even remember most of it. I know I got a Tetanus shot though.

Thursday. I went back to work Thursday. And I went back to the scene of the crime. Where I got jumped. I know they were watching me. But I wasn't alone this time. I had my friend with me, so they stayed away. I was so happy that I found my glasses. I finally was able to talk to the police about what happened.

Friday. Our car gave out several times, so now I not only had to worry about my own well being, but my mother's and my siblings' safety. I didn't exactly spend that day in a peaceful mood.

Saturday. Today. I had to go to work to file a report. I was alone. And lo and behold, they come again. They jumped me again. AGAIN. But there was a major difference this time. The gun. If I hadn't had the training I had...would I still be here? I don't know. I really don't know.

And ya know something? ...I'm scared. Not just because I'm worried about my safety. But what about all the others that I'm close to? That have to be in that area? They were able to recognize me on sight. ...Who's to say they wouldn't be able to recognize one of my friends? ...I don't know what to do. I'm so scared and I don't know what to do.

Actually. I do know. If I see them again. I'm going to kill them. All three of them. They've forced me into this position, and they've brought this upon themselves. If they jump me again, I will snatch that gun out of their hands and I will kill them with it. I can't let those criminals run around free."

Now keep in mind while I wrote that journal I was BURNING with rage. Even though I fought them off and got them to run away, they still hurt me pretty bad. Here are some pictures of my injuries that were taken at the hospital.

1 (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

https://www.dropbox.com/s/8aocpikg5kvgmpv/IMG_1060.jpg

2 (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

https://www.dropbox.com/s/rh5g6yjl8atvcxm/IMG_2913.jpg

3 (Click Here To Hide/Show Text)

https://www.dropbox.com/s/rdj6tho9ttbwg2v/IMG_3514.jpg

I wasn't dead, but I was still pretty messed up. Not just physically, but most importantly mentally. Not only was I already in a ridiculously unstable mental state due to what was going on with my mother, but you have to ask yourself. Why did those guys run away? Well the thing is, I did a lot more than just punch them. I thought I might have actually killed one of them. I said that they ran off, but the truth is that they ran off...while carrying one of their friends. Why is this enough to make me be in that mindset? Well I had blood all over me. And again, I was already extremely unstable to begin with.

After calming myself and allowing myself to think things through, I decided that despite how badly I've crippled people in the past, I've never ended anyone's life. And I didn't want to become a murderer. So I decided that I would work with a detective and try my absolute hardest to get them arrested.

And on July 29, I succeeded in getting them arrested.

Despite me succeeding in getting them arrested, I was still out of my right mindset. I still didn't feel like...me anymore. I didn't have my peace of mind just yet. But on August 10th, something else happened. I'll paste my journal entry about that.

"So last night. I couldn't sleep. I really needed a drink, but we didn't have any at the house. So I finally convinced myself to go around the corner to the gas station. But it was 1AM. I walk around the corner. No problems. I go inside and buy my stuff. No problems. I even have a laugh with the homeless man who stays by the gas station.

But as I'm walking away. I hear a man yelling at a woman. I'm walking away. Thinking to myself, "Don't get involved. Don't get involved." But I just can't ignore it, and I turn around. I tell them to break it up. The man doesn't listen. I get between him and the woman. The man threatens the woman, and she retorts. Then the man tries to run after her.

Without thinking. I stopped him. I got in the way. And the woman was able to get away. As I'm holding the man down, he's cursing and threatening the woman as she leaves. I push the man down and tell him to calm the hell down. And he goes back into his store.

As I'm walking home, I'm thinking to myself. "Why did I get involved? I got jumped recently. People attempted to kill me recently. So why did I put myself at risk for someone I didn't even know? Why did it feel so easy to get involved this time?"

And as I thought about this, I realized. I thought I was just telling myself that I put other's lives before mine. But after that, I realized. I was right. It was easier to get involved and stop that man because I wasn't attacking him. I was protecting someone. I realized that all these thoughts that I thought were merely delusions..were true. My thought process really does work like that of a protector of the weak. I really CAN'T walk by someone who needs my help if I can help them. And most of all, I realized the difference between this night and the night those guys jumped me. When they jumped me, I wasn't in my right mind. I was confused, upset, and...scared. But this night, I was completely normal. AJ tells me all the time that I can be a badass, but I always blew that off as him just being silly. But when I really take the time to look at myself from other people's perspective. I can realize.

I really am a hero. I really am a role model. I really am a badass. But I realized something. I'm only like that...when other people need me to be. If I hadn't been out there, who knows what would have happened to that woman? The only other person out there was the old homeless man. And he wouldn't have been able to do anything.

I can't completely describe how this makes me feel...but it makes me feel good."

So to make a long story short, the past few weeks have been EXTREMELY eventful. And I just figured I'm stable enough to tell more people about what happened.

[Fire Blazer]

that's...

._.

Can I just give you a hug?

Also, move. Please. For me. Move somewhere safe. This place sounds awful. I have enough problems in my life without worrying about you either killing someone or getting killed. Do all your friends a favor and move somewhere better. >___________>

[Rujio]

Why don't you just move over here? This one time the local Walgreens got robbed, and it was like a huge deal because nothing that awful every happens here; the local news has a "crime tracker" thing, and it showed that one crime had happened within a mile of the store within the previous month. One incident of illegal activity, period. Although it's good to hear that you seem to feel pretty good about what happened in the end.

Also, was this your 1337th post? If so, congrats. Great post to hit that count with!

[kirant]

QUOTE (Rujio @ Aug 14 2014, 04:33 PM)

Why don't you just move over here? This one time the local Walgreens got robbed, and it was like a huge deal because nothing that awful every happens here; the local news has a "crime tracker" thing, and it showed that one crime had happened within a mile of the store within the previous month. One incident of illegal activity, period. Although it's good to hear that you seem to feel pretty good about what happened in the end. Also, was this your 1337th post? If so, congrats. Great post to hit that count with!

Move to Canada. As a comedian put it, he was shocked that every murder is reported up here.

[Oblivion Knight]

Counting on you to have my back when I go back down to Georgia for Smite Worlds. I believe in you buddy, don't let 'em get you down.

[Elwood]

Christ dude. I agree with Blazer, major bro hug. I generally get really mad when I see people I care about hurt and you better believe I was bloody furious after I saw those pics and what you had said sunk in. Glad to hear those guys got arrested. But yeah what you said is true about defending those who can't defend themselves. Some believe it is the role of the strong to rule the weak but I, like you, believe in the exact opposite. You stay safe now, ya' hear? You need anything I'm always available.

[SmashedFish]

...holy hell, Arim.

...come here. *hugs a lot and never lets go*

Honestly, though, if my mom kicked me out and then her car gave out, her well being would be just about the last thing on my mind. That takes serious kindness, to be worried about that with everything else going on too. And your games? You retuned to the site twice, and even faced a gun. Don't say you're a coward. There's times when it's better to play it safe, after all, and that was certainly one of them. I'm sorry to hear about your lost games, though. I lost a few two months ago, but I can't imagine what it'd be like to lose them all. Here's hoping you find them.

Stay safe though, you hear? We still haven't gone to a con yet, and I haven't even been able to challenge you to a DDR-off! Anyway, I'd miss you... You're an amazing person, and a real inspiration for handling everything the way you did. You'll be in my prayers. Take care, my friend.

[arimibn]

@Blazer As much as I'd LOVE to be able to move somewhere that's safer...I really just don't have the finances for it. I make a little over enough to pay my bills. And my parents have this bad habit of screwing me over based on the grudges they hold against each other. (They've been divorced since I was around 1 or 2 years old.) So yeah, unless I win the lottery and/or find someone who is willing to essentially let me live with them for free...that's just not an option available to me now.

@Rujio Like I said, I'm not opposed to moving, I'm just not financially able to do it. There are a lot of factors that would play into this. And no matter how much I want to move, I just don't think anyone would be willing to pay for me, a grown man. And lolno. This isn't my 1337th post. That was like, months and months ago.

@Kirant Alas, I lack the finances.

@Oblivion While I can't say I've been through worse this time, I still lived through it, so that's gotta count for something.

@Elwood I am all too familiar with the rage that comes from seeing someone you care about being hurt. I'm just protective by nature. This protective nature of mine extends far beyond just people that I know. And well, the main thing I need right now is money. I'm not getting kicked out on the street or anything, but I don't exactly have the finances to put myself in a better situation.

@Leetofish I know all too well that there are people who need me alive, so I won't kick the bucket that easily. Haha. But in all seriousness. I've taken some extra precautions to make myself better prepared in the event some other idiots show up and try to jump me. While yeah, I can really kick some butt in a fight, it didn't hurt to get this taser and this pepper spray that I carry around with me now. Still gotta get around to getting my gun permit though. After all, as my favorite cyborg ninja once said, "One sword keeps another in the sheath. Sometimes the threat of violence acts as a deterrent. Sometimes, by taking a life, others can be preserved."

I'm a very strong, very driven, and very resillient person. But I'm not stupid. I'm not going to ignore the obvious precautions I need to take. And I /do/ want to live, after all.

[Fire Blazer]

ugh. I want to argue with you but you wouldn't say you can't move if you really couldn't. >_< It just. hurts. that I can't do anything. dammit. *headdesk*

if my game takes off. I will donate to the "move Arim somewhere safe!" fund. in fact you should totally kickstart this. the "MOVE ARIM SOMEWHERE SAFE" campaign will be a big hit, I just feel it!

[acceptance]

^^^^^^^^^^^

Count me in.

[Fire Blazer]

they funded that potato salad, anything is possible

[bofafilly]

A father of five came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present, "Who is the most obedient, never talks back to mother and does everything he or she is told?" he inquired. There was silence and then a chorus of voices: "You play with it, Daddy!"





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